God’s call:  
“He Tricked Me Into It!”

By Brother Kevin McGuire, O.S.B.
I grew up in a loving, stable Catholic family in St. Francis Parish in Oklahoma City, in those “easier times” before the Vatican Council. All of us three boys went eight years to Rosary School, and, though we didn’t know it at the time, we benefited greatly from the discipline, devotion, and responsibility we were taught by the Dominican Sisters.  

This was before drugs became such a hurdle for youth, or television and computers challenged good values. Before the moral decline of this nation, and before the excessive world violence and fear we know today. It was a safe and secure world, where cop cars were seldom seen in residential neighborhoods, crime was minimal, and the worst trouble a young boy usually got into was fighting with his brothers, or accidentally breaking out a neighbor’s window with a slingshot (while shooting birds).    

Dad was home every night from his job at the bank, and Mom was usually home all the time! Without a doubt, Mom’s love has been the greatest influence on my life, and I’m fortunate to have her still with us now, at nearly 90 years old. What a blessing-and a “feathered nest”-as I look back on it!! By teen years, I often played softball in the back yard with my brothers, if we were not out mowing neighbor’s lawns as a summer job. I have such happy memories of good family and the wonderful neighborhood and friends of those “formative” years. We said grace before meals at our house, and could count on a family Rosary as the evening wore down. Our sister, Kathy, was born when I was in Seventh grade, so the folks greatly enjoyed raising a girl with all the interests and refinements we boys scoffed at.

From this setting, one can imagine why I experienced homesickness for the first few times away from home. My first-very few-days in high school (in 1953) were at the Seminary at the old St. Joseph’s Orphanage setting in Bethany. Partly because of homesickness, and secretly because God had something else planned, I was back home after a week. After that, I went to the newly opened northwest “Catholic High” for my first two years of high school. Living at home meant that I could also pursue the “mechanical things” I had such great interest in. By the age of 12 I had various old cars, and I modified a bicycle frame with a Briggs engine that I rode to high school those two years. With such distractions, however, my application to ‘studies’ brought poor grades, and the folks decided I might do better at St. Gregory’s (then a boy’s boarding high school) where my older brother Gerald was already a student. So in the fall of ‘55, I began here as a junior. That turned out to be the first step ‘in the direction’ of God’s plan.

Another bout with homesickness followed, but I eventually took to the “reform school” life. NOT that I reformed; rather I found people and things (work projects and mechanical things!) to “distract me” even here from too much studying! I fell into snooping around the old Powerhouse (which had a welder, tools, and a dilapidated tractor!), and to helping some of the monks with a variety of projects. Fr. Robert Dodson was then beginning to hang the revolutionary “indirect lighting” fixtures that replaced the bare incandescent bulbs in the classrooms. He somehow talked me into climbing the ladder and getting shocked while “working hot” with the old wiring (all black wires)-as he encouraged me from below. We became a team, and the two of us updated many rooms together over several weeks of after-school work. I also helped on digging a grave or two, and with lawn mowing. Anything but study!

After a while, Brother Andrew Raple began dropping hints that I should “stay the summer” and look into the monk’s life. I told him that I could make money at lawn mowing back home, plus I’d have so many other freedoms that summer vacation offered. I indicated in no uncertain terms that I would not stay, and I thought no more about it. By my next (Senior) year, my drooling started over the awareness that school would soon be over. I had no firm plans for “life after high school,” except for NO MORE SCHOOL!!!

But, Brother Andrew and Father Edward Bock (who was vocations director at that time), had not lost interest that a few of us students might try the monastic life. In total connivance and secrecy, they had been working out a plan for us to try the monastic life and possibly become “recruits.” Their efforts were solely predicated on my refusal to ‘waste my summer vacation’ for such effort.  When we returned from Christmas break (January of ‘57) and had settled-in again, Brother came around one evening to each of the four he had been working on and said: “pack your bags, we are moving over to the monastery.” What a surprise!  I had had no intention of doing anything like that, but they had already arranged that we continue classes while living with the monks and I would still graduate with my group. So I went. Even Abbot Philip, who was away on a trip, knew nothing of the plan. But he wasn’t about to deny the prospects of “new blood” for the community.

We four students (all at different levels academically) lived in the unfinished ground floor of the monastery. We joined the monks in prayers and meals, and had a daily recreation period among ourselves, always with an older monk assigned for our guidance. We had some after-school work time when our studies permitted, which mine always did! One of my most difficult adjustments was to learn to recite the Choir prayers in Latin (my most hated subject in school!). Now that I had a use for it, though, I found it less painful. And, we had books with the English translation right beside the Latin. I learned more vocabulary in a week than I did in two years of Latin class (while I was resisting it). All in all, I found the routine becoming “acceptable.” And I took most readily to the work projects.    

By graduation, I was inclined to ‘stay a few more weeks.’ The other guys were staying. The clincher in the devious plan was that the six months of “postulancy” required for candidates would then be complete by July 10, the traditional time for starting the Novitiate in the Benedictine Order. While not overly enthused about so much praying, I was curiously finding myself happy enough ‘around here’ that God’s grace convinced me to stay a while longer. I became a Novice with the others. The Novitiate is a one-year period of more intense study and living the monastic life, a “free home demonstration,” and a closer look into the possibilities of lifetime commitment.

One step led to another, and I was hooked. With the astute ministry of two of His henchmen, God had tricked me into it!  Two out of the other three that joined with me eventually left the community. It took me about 10 years, but I have been convinced ever since that God knew better than I did what would be for my own happiness and fulfillment. What grace and love God pours into the lives of each of us. I keep thinking of de Chardin’s phrase: “My life is given to me... far more than it is formed by me!” How “thoughtful” of God to so wonderfully cater to my needs for happiness in life, at the time I was least sensitive to His gentle nudges!! And how delightful to clearly see the evidence of His love...in hindsight!

Both of my brothers tried the monastic life for differing lengths of time, but left. Over the years, and as God’s grace would have it, my feelings of “rightness,” peace, and contentment have just increased to unbelievable levels-such that I “envy myself” every aspect of the GOOD life God’s love has provided for me! Having always enjoyed physical labor, I find my outdoor work life as Abbey auto mechanic and campus landscaper (mainly nurturing trees in every corner of our beautiful setting) to contribute greatly to that overwhelming sense of well-being.

The many ways that I have been able to contribute to my little corner of the world over the years is of great consolation to me.  Without a doubt, one of the most unexpected features of my nearly 50 years on this campus has been the great number and quality of the friends-in all walks of life-who enrich my journey beyond measure. The example of their commitment and love (mostly within a family setting) has greatly enhanced my life and my walk with God “on this side of the fence.” I draw immense strength and support from them, and now publicly THANK THEM!!  

What a great blessing this life has been for me. Indeed, gratitude is by far my most frequent prayer, because, on a scale of one to 10, my life has always been a grace-filled 11!!

With heart-felt Love and Prayers, I am, A brother to everyone, Kevin, osb.